Do you struggle with an Abusive Friend or Family Member?

‘Friends are meant to enhance our lives. They are meant to make us feel better. They are the other us. We have common values. But does that often happen?’ Victorine Mbong Shu in the book ‘Trapped in our shadows.’

Without limiting the definition, a friend like a family member is defined as someone who goes with you in the good times and bad times. Good friends are always by your side in every time of your life and they expect you to be same with them. They pray and they play. You fight, they fight. You make up, they make up. Most people who have no friends are not friendly themselves. A friend can be defined as companion, close friend, family friend, etc. some people do not mind to define the intimacy of their relationship with others, but the level of transactions between them do. For instance, Rachel and Herodias in the book ‘Trapped in our shadows’ are defined as close friends and subsequently family friends because the transactions between the two of them extended to their partners and subsequently their children.
What is abuse
Abuse is mostly cultural bound, but it is a pattern of behaviour easily used to gain and maintain power and control. Abuse comes in many forms. No one deserves to experience any form of it.
Handling Abuse
Practice self-care like. Look after yourself in how you approach the situation because you are the one who is being crushed.
Do not be sympathetic because abusive people play mind games.
They always have excuses.
They confuse you and make you to regret what is happening.
Forget about remaining a friend.
Forget about being liked.
Forget about remining in the friendship.
Forget about being accepted.
Forget about rejection.
Forget about being kind.
Stop weighing options.
Should we measure what we benefit from our friends?
If so. What are the values we share?
Have you ever walked away and you are followed?
Watch this space for articled from the book ‘Trapped in our shadows.’
Announcement: Book Launch1‘ Title: ‘Trapped in our shadows’ Author: Victorine Mbong Shu, Publisher: Profounder Intelligence, Launch Date: 6th July 2017, Published: 2017

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